So, I go to Drudge last night and I am mildly annoyed to see this story about the immigration rallies behing held the last few days. You know, the rallies being held by people that have snuck into this country illegally and are now trying to tell us how to run our country. Right, those ones. (These people are represented in Washington, by the way, by the party that lost the last couple Presidential elections as well as control of both the House and Senate, and now want to tell the winning party how to run the country. Talk about synchronicity)
Anyhoo, other than being mildly annoyed, I've become a little ticked off again at the innefficiency of our government. There were at least 100,000 people gathered together all told in these various rallies, and our immigration officials apparently did nothing about it. How great would it have been had they done their jobs and rounded these people up to cart them back across the border where they belong.
Don't get me wrong, I love America, and if I didn't live here I would sure want to. What I wouldn't do though is start waving my fist in the air and start telling Americans that I had a right to live here, and that Americans had were really really mean and unfair for trying to determine the conditions under which I get to live here. Sorry, that's the kind of stuff that gets under my collar and makes me want (even more) to toughen up the security on our borders.
One final thing, just a piece of advice here. If you're marching in an immigration rights rally and you want me to "hear" your message, then it's not a good idea for you to print your sign in spanish. First rule of America, the language is English. Learn it.
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Herbal link? The "Why is this news" story of the day.
A recent study has found that teens that use herbal remedies are more prone to using illicit drugs. In my house right now crickets are chirping and nobody has noticed I said anything at all. There is no surprise here.
Actually, that's not entirely true, I'm surprised that the people that conducted this study got the relationship backwards. What it really should say is that teens that use illicit drugs (specifically marijuana) are more likely to use herbal remedies.
You know why? Because herbal has the word herb in it. That's it, that is all there is to it. The thought processes go something like this:
1. I like the way this herb makes me feel.
2. I would like some nachos and a bowl of ice cream.
3. My stomach hurts.
4. I wonder how that herb will make me feel.
It's really that simple. And unfortunately, speaking as a former teen that smoked pot, I can confirm that the best part of using an herbal remedy is that you get to say the word herb. You get to be in the herb club.
I once knew a guy we called Herb, and whenever he entered a room we would call out his name like he was Norm from Cheers. I know they have all kinds of names for the stuff now, but back in the day we just said "Hey, got any herb?" because we liked calling it herb.
Wouldn't it be nice if someone would spend some money on something like, I don't know, actually doing something to prevent teens from smoking herb?
Actually, that's not entirely true, I'm surprised that the people that conducted this study got the relationship backwards. What it really should say is that teens that use illicit drugs (specifically marijuana) are more likely to use herbal remedies.
You know why? Because herbal has the word herb in it. That's it, that is all there is to it. The thought processes go something like this:
1. I like the way this herb makes me feel.
2. I would like some nachos and a bowl of ice cream.
3. My stomach hurts.
4. I wonder how that herb will make me feel.
It's really that simple. And unfortunately, speaking as a former teen that smoked pot, I can confirm that the best part of using an herbal remedy is that you get to say the word herb. You get to be in the herb club.
I once knew a guy we called Herb, and whenever he entered a room we would call out his name like he was Norm from Cheers. I know they have all kinds of names for the stuff now, but back in the day we just said "Hey, got any herb?" because we liked calling it herb.
Wouldn't it be nice if someone would spend some money on something like, I don't know, actually doing something to prevent teens from smoking herb?
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Manliness
This is an e-mail I sent off this morning regarding this article in the Washington Post.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/03/20/AR2006032001416_pf.html
I just couldn't take it any more this morning.
"Manliness" didn't begin with the Bush White House, nor can it's root cause be traced back to any time in recorded history. It is and has always been, and a good thing for us it has. As you freely admit, it is men that rise to the top in political parties, and there is no way you could argue that it is not that way across all walks of life. Without this "manliness" you're so readily willing to tout as a negative aspect, our world would be markedly different, and not at all for the better.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/03/20/AR2006032001416_pf.html
I just couldn't take it any more this morning.
"Manliness" didn't begin with the Bush White House, nor can it's root cause be traced back to any time in recorded history. It is and has always been, and a good thing for us it has. As you freely admit, it is men that rise to the top in political parties, and there is no way you could argue that it is not that way across all walks of life. Without this "manliness" you're so readily willing to tout as a negative aspect, our world would be markedly different, and not at all for the better.
Are there negative aspects to masculinity? Certainly, but by bringing up the Iraq war to try and emphasize that you've dropped the ball completely. Nobody is really arguing that in circumstances where a maniacal dictator is torturing his own citizens and thumbing his nose at the world, the right to take preemptive action exists. Even if you wanted to argue that point, and frankly, you would be a fool and an ass to do so, you need to broaden the scope of your attack and start with the politicians not in the President's party who gave him approval in the first place.
Secondly, I don't have a problem with an administration that doesn't want to take time away from managing the country to give you answers that are going to make you feel better. I trust that if there were sufficient evidence to censure or impeach this President, then his drooling and frothing at the mouth political opponents would have acted instantaneously, but thus far there is but one lonely voice officially raised. Yet you and others like you follow down that path of misinformation like sheep, sure that even though the Democrats have done nothing but throw vile accusations and grandstand, that somewhere in there lies some truth which backs up your own reactionary and paranoid point of view.
Finally, I want a leader as a President. If he wants to take some personal friends aside and confess to some introspection or self doubt, then that's fine. The day he gets up in front of the nation and waxes philosophic and shows some weakness, you and the other sharks are going to go into a feeding frenzy. You have NOTHING positive to say to or about the man, and if you had any credibility whatsoever you would admit that the moment he showed any weakness you would pounce. I wish you could see yourself and your complaints about the "swaggering dismissal of dissenting views as the carping of those not on the team" for the ridiculously humorous statements they are. You ARE NOT on the team, so why then do you think you are entitled to intimacy of such a level?
You may not like manliness, but from the first man that picked up a club to beat back a predator, to people like Edison and Einstein, all the way to more modern hero's such as Mandela and Billy Graham, it has primarily been men furthering the betterment of humanity. That's because, no matter how much you may not like it, it is the way God intended for it to be, it is the way it has always been, and it is the way it will always be. I freely admit that every one of these men and men like them typically had a woman of strength and character partnered with him (much Like Laura Bush, but nothing like Hillary Clinton).
For the record, I have significant problems with the President's fiscal irresponsibilities and his handling of our illegal immigration problems. I do not, however, have a problem with him trying to comport himself like a man.
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Wall of Pride
Maybe you have always known what it is you are going to do with your life, maybe you are just that lucky. Perhaps you haven't known exactly, but you were blessed with a good upbringing and learned early how to plan and be organized so when you finally figured it out you were able to dive right in.
That's not my life. None of it.
For 37 years I walked this earth and I never, never, never, never felt completely comfortable in my own skin. A lot of people are surprised when I say things like that, or if I confess to how melancholy I can sometimes be, because I am always quick to laugh and as outgoing of a person as you will find.
I've had little glimpses of what I might like to do, that's how I ended up with a Psychology degree and its why I'm in a sales job right now. As much as I do love my current job though, it still just doesn't always quite fit me.
It's been frustrating living like this, it's been difficult to breathe.
What I just came to realize is that this whole time (and I'm sure it's like this...maybe..... for everyone..?) for a large part, it's been me holding me back.
I have known, and known for a long time what I am meant to do. I just didn't believe it. I just didn't believe it could happen to me. I just didn't believe that I could be so happy doing the thing that I am supposed to be doing. Now I know better.
Psalm 139 says that:
1. God knows us and everything about us. He is an expert in all of our ways, and there is no place we can hide. Most importantly, he has beset us on all sides. (beset has quite a few meanings, but in this case we'll settle for hemmed in, the other definitions bring different analogies to mind, although they describe His perfect love just as well)
2. There is nowhere we can go to escape God, He is always there. Always. It's never too dark, too bright, too deep, too anything for God not to be aware of every circumstance in our lives.
3. He has made us. We were nothing before we were a thought in His head. We are His creation. He didn't make us like you make a pot of coffee either, the only analogy that can even begin to approach the way in which God made us would be to say He created us like the same way that Michelangelo created things. Even then, Michelangelo's greatest work was mere fingerpainting compared to the work God did when He created you and I.
4. Before you lived a single day of your life, God knew what your last breath would be like. He is in complete control of everything, every person, place and thing, at every moment.
5. Most importantly (for my purposes), God's thoughts about us, God's thoughts about you the reader, and me the writer are inumerable. Let me make this clearer, because I don't want to send a collective message when I'm trying to imply a specific one. God's thoughts about you are countless, more than you could ever even fathom. There is not a moment in your life that God didn't already think about a Godzillion times, and it's the same for the next moment, and the one after that, and the one after that.
I know all that and have known it. Psalm 139 is my favorite passage in the whole Bible, and has been for a long time. I know it is a passage meant for me, because it keeps cropping back up in my life over and over again. Considering all of the verses and chapters in the Bible, it's too much of a coincidence for it to be an accident. Even if you take out all of the "begatting" verses and things like that, it would still be too much of a coincidence. it would be like running across the same Peanuts comic once a week for 10 years in different places and publications.
If there is one thing that God wants me to know, it is that He is in control, He has been in control, and He will always be in control.
And still, knowing that, I doubted that God wanted me to use my musical and speaking talents for Him. Still I doubted that something which is both an accident and a blessing could be my purpose, my calling. Why?
Because I love to do it so much.
What's wrong with me??!!
God has blessed me over the past couple of years, because I have been using these gifts primarily to serve Him. I never feel more in tune with God than when I am singing and playing and praising Him. (Conversely, I never feel more out of tune than when I am singing and playing...not for Him.)
Last year after I ruptured my spleen and almost died, I offered my meager gifts to Him for whatever purpose He intended, but I still didn't believe that much would come of it. I began to get an inkling that what He had planned was more than I could fathom because of opportunities that arose for me to use my gifts in various ways.
Still, I would downplay it all by saying things like "I want to play the guitar when I grow up", which I've said a few times over the past few weeks. I meant it to be funny, and it did get a few chuckles, but in my heart I was saying "I want to do this, but I just don't believe it's going to happen to me."
I wasn't completely disparaging God and myself though. I've also had a couple of conversations with people where I've talked about what an accident it is that I can even play the guitar or sing. I do not have guitar players hands, they're short and stubby, and there is nobody else in my family that can even hum well. I wanted to believe that these things were all part of a plan God had for my life, but again, I liked doing them too much for me to believe this was my calling.
What a prideful fool I've been.
I have had an epiphany. I've finally put all of the clues together. First of all, I know God has a plan for my life, and that He has created me in such a way that Iwill be prepared to carry it out. Second of all, and more importantly, I know this plan is a good plan, a plan of peace and hope. So, I know that even if right now I'm totally misleading myself, that this was part of God's plan!
But I don't think I am being misled. I don't feel I'm being misled.
For the first time in my life, for the first time ever, I can say that I believe I was born to minister to other people through speaking, playing and singing, and I believe it can happen. I don't know if God wants me to continue to play for groups around here or enjoy a different level of success, but I know what He wants me to do.
I consider it all joy for every single trial I went through in my lifetime. God has used each one of them to make me steadfast, but He has also used each one of them to purify and refine me, to strip away my hurtful harmful pride that stood in the way of me doing what He wanted me to do.
I can remember specific days in my life when I had screwed things up or failed and how I felt at exact moments. There were moments in my life when I did things that I knew were not part of the plan, but I did them anyway because I wanted to. I can recall intimately the utter shame I felt in those moments. At the time I felt so far from God, so unworthy, and I imagined Him being disappointed with me, so hurt that I would not or could not approach Him.
I don't think that's how it was though. I can hear his voice now, I can hear the echo of it throughout all of those days. I can hear Him calling to me in this moment, and throughout all of my years.
I have a vision of Jesus in my mind, standing on the other side of my wall of pride. He is stripped to the waist, sweat covers his body and each one of those trials that I have suffered through has been a swing He has taken with a sledgehammer at my wall of pride.
Oh, in those moments, when that sledgehammer rang off of my wall the pain was excruciating. All I could hear and feel was the sound of it's smack in my ears telling me I had failed somehow, and the vibration of the impact as it made it's way through my life. I still have some of the scars.
I've taken a lot of hits off that wall in 38 years, but it took that long, and it took that many blows for me to finally be able to hear something else over the wall.
Now that the wall has come down some, I can hear Jesus, as He swings away at that wall. I can hear Him calling to me throughout all of my years, saying:
"I'm coming Randy. I'm coming and I hear you crying." His words echo. " I will break down this wall and set you free"
"I have a plan for you."
Today I feel very blessed, very grateful, and very humble, because I believe I know what God has called me to do. Finally.
Do you know? Have you submitted yourself to God, to the King of all creation? Or are you behind a wall? Whether you can hear it or not, He's calling you. Whether you can hear it or not, I'm praying for you.
Some of this stuff isn't easy to admit to, but now I have a sledgehammer too.
That's not my life. None of it.
For 37 years I walked this earth and I never, never, never, never felt completely comfortable in my own skin. A lot of people are surprised when I say things like that, or if I confess to how melancholy I can sometimes be, because I am always quick to laugh and as outgoing of a person as you will find.
I've had little glimpses of what I might like to do, that's how I ended up with a Psychology degree and its why I'm in a sales job right now. As much as I do love my current job though, it still just doesn't always quite fit me.
It's been frustrating living like this, it's been difficult to breathe.
What I just came to realize is that this whole time (and I'm sure it's like this...maybe..... for everyone..?) for a large part, it's been me holding me back.
I have known, and known for a long time what I am meant to do. I just didn't believe it. I just didn't believe it could happen to me. I just didn't believe that I could be so happy doing the thing that I am supposed to be doing. Now I know better.
Psalm 139 says that:
1. God knows us and everything about us. He is an expert in all of our ways, and there is no place we can hide. Most importantly, he has beset us on all sides. (beset has quite a few meanings, but in this case we'll settle for hemmed in, the other definitions bring different analogies to mind, although they describe His perfect love just as well)
2. There is nowhere we can go to escape God, He is always there. Always. It's never too dark, too bright, too deep, too anything for God not to be aware of every circumstance in our lives.
3. He has made us. We were nothing before we were a thought in His head. We are His creation. He didn't make us like you make a pot of coffee either, the only analogy that can even begin to approach the way in which God made us would be to say He created us like the same way that Michelangelo created things. Even then, Michelangelo's greatest work was mere fingerpainting compared to the work God did when He created you and I.
4. Before you lived a single day of your life, God knew what your last breath would be like. He is in complete control of everything, every person, place and thing, at every moment.
5. Most importantly (for my purposes), God's thoughts about us, God's thoughts about you the reader, and me the writer are inumerable. Let me make this clearer, because I don't want to send a collective message when I'm trying to imply a specific one. God's thoughts about you are countless, more than you could ever even fathom. There is not a moment in your life that God didn't already think about a Godzillion times, and it's the same for the next moment, and the one after that, and the one after that.
I know all that and have known it. Psalm 139 is my favorite passage in the whole Bible, and has been for a long time. I know it is a passage meant for me, because it keeps cropping back up in my life over and over again. Considering all of the verses and chapters in the Bible, it's too much of a coincidence for it to be an accident. Even if you take out all of the "begatting" verses and things like that, it would still be too much of a coincidence. it would be like running across the same Peanuts comic once a week for 10 years in different places and publications.
If there is one thing that God wants me to know, it is that He is in control, He has been in control, and He will always be in control.
And still, knowing that, I doubted that God wanted me to use my musical and speaking talents for Him. Still I doubted that something which is both an accident and a blessing could be my purpose, my calling. Why?
Because I love to do it so much.
What's wrong with me??!!
God has blessed me over the past couple of years, because I have been using these gifts primarily to serve Him. I never feel more in tune with God than when I am singing and playing and praising Him. (Conversely, I never feel more out of tune than when I am singing and playing...not for Him.)
Last year after I ruptured my spleen and almost died, I offered my meager gifts to Him for whatever purpose He intended, but I still didn't believe that much would come of it. I began to get an inkling that what He had planned was more than I could fathom because of opportunities that arose for me to use my gifts in various ways.
Still, I would downplay it all by saying things like "I want to play the guitar when I grow up", which I've said a few times over the past few weeks. I meant it to be funny, and it did get a few chuckles, but in my heart I was saying "I want to do this, but I just don't believe it's going to happen to me."
I wasn't completely disparaging God and myself though. I've also had a couple of conversations with people where I've talked about what an accident it is that I can even play the guitar or sing. I do not have guitar players hands, they're short and stubby, and there is nobody else in my family that can even hum well. I wanted to believe that these things were all part of a plan God had for my life, but again, I liked doing them too much for me to believe this was my calling.
What a prideful fool I've been.
I have had an epiphany. I've finally put all of the clues together. First of all, I know God has a plan for my life, and that He has created me in such a way that Iwill be prepared to carry it out. Second of all, and more importantly, I know this plan is a good plan, a plan of peace and hope. So, I know that even if right now I'm totally misleading myself, that this was part of God's plan!
But I don't think I am being misled. I don't feel I'm being misled.
For the first time in my life, for the first time ever, I can say that I believe I was born to minister to other people through speaking, playing and singing, and I believe it can happen. I don't know if God wants me to continue to play for groups around here or enjoy a different level of success, but I know what He wants me to do.
I consider it all joy for every single trial I went through in my lifetime. God has used each one of them to make me steadfast, but He has also used each one of them to purify and refine me, to strip away my hurtful harmful pride that stood in the way of me doing what He wanted me to do.
I can remember specific days in my life when I had screwed things up or failed and how I felt at exact moments. There were moments in my life when I did things that I knew were not part of the plan, but I did them anyway because I wanted to. I can recall intimately the utter shame I felt in those moments. At the time I felt so far from God, so unworthy, and I imagined Him being disappointed with me, so hurt that I would not or could not approach Him.
I don't think that's how it was though. I can hear his voice now, I can hear the echo of it throughout all of those days. I can hear Him calling to me in this moment, and throughout all of my years.
I have a vision of Jesus in my mind, standing on the other side of my wall of pride. He is stripped to the waist, sweat covers his body and each one of those trials that I have suffered through has been a swing He has taken with a sledgehammer at my wall of pride.
Oh, in those moments, when that sledgehammer rang off of my wall the pain was excruciating. All I could hear and feel was the sound of it's smack in my ears telling me I had failed somehow, and the vibration of the impact as it made it's way through my life. I still have some of the scars.
I've taken a lot of hits off that wall in 38 years, but it took that long, and it took that many blows for me to finally be able to hear something else over the wall.
Now that the wall has come down some, I can hear Jesus, as He swings away at that wall. I can hear Him calling to me throughout all of my years, saying:
"I'm coming Randy. I'm coming and I hear you crying." His words echo. " I will break down this wall and set you free"
"I have a plan for you."
Today I feel very blessed, very grateful, and very humble, because I believe I know what God has called me to do. Finally.
Do you know? Have you submitted yourself to God, to the King of all creation? Or are you behind a wall? Whether you can hear it or not, He's calling you. Whether you can hear it or not, I'm praying for you.
Some of this stuff isn't easy to admit to, but now I have a sledgehammer too.
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
Always Gay?
Okay, I'm writing this here because I don't want to be obtrusive, but I do need to talk about it.
(Edit - It just occurred to me how funny it is that I would post this in my blog because this is where the least amount of people will see it)
I have recently come into contact with a friend from college, well, more of an acquaintance but somebody I really liked and thought well of, who is now a lesbian. (okay, let's not argue about the exigesis of lesbianism, ie. whether it has genetic causation. I'm not saying that she was or wasn't always a lesbian, I'm just saying that right now, if you were to ask her, she would say "I am a lesbian.")
I was really psyched when I found her on-line. Over the years she's someone that I've thought about from time to time and wished I had stayed in touch with. When we were in college (Geneva College) we shared some of the same "hobbies" that other students at Geneva wouldn't normally participate in. Okay, we liked to party and we both had an affinity for the Grateful Dead. We also were both Psychology majors, and we did at least one study/paper together. I've just always thought she was so intelligent and she made me laugh. Even now, I read through her blog and I am just cracking up.
Before I go on, let's get one thing clear. I am a liar and a thief. I have no inherent right to my salvation, it is only by the grace of God that I am saved. I judge nobody, at least not unrighteously. Well, I try not to anyway. I just want to throw that out there, because I am not dealing with emotions right now in writing this, only in what has been reported and what is written. Most importantly for this conversation, I am not judging her or the choice she has made. (Again, whether or not it was a choice is not the focus of this conversation, but I would certainly be willing to hear your opinion. Especially if you don't try to denigrate me as a person if my opinion is not the same as yours........you know, I'm not sure when I took on this whole peaceful diplomatic personality that's been developing recently, but I'm starting to make myself a little sick with all of it. Why can't I just tell people to stick it in their ear like I used to?)
Anyhoo....I've been praying for my friend, and I've been trying to just be a friend and nothing more. I have been praying that God would afford me the opportunity to talk with her about this as well, but we've only been back in touch for a short time and that hasn't, and may not happen. In short, I'm attempting to model my behavior after what I know of Jesus.
I also don't want to preach, and I don't think I have anything new to add to the conversations that may have already taken place in real life, or at least inside of her head concerning the Biblical stance on homosexuality.
I just want to tell her that I can't make it through my day without God leading the way. There are other things that she has written in her blog that I am empathetic to, things that have nothing to do with sex, but have to do with things like family, lonliness and having your heart broken. I just want her to know that I've been through so many of those circumstances, I've tried to shoulder the burden myself through situations just like those, but I have finally realized after last year that I can't do it. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to admit, but it freed me. I am not a weak man, not physically, not mentally and not spiritually, but I am woefully underequipped to handle all of the things that the world throws at us day after day after day after day.....
So, I don't want to preach, but I wouldn't mind informing. I did a little research today and I found out a few things.
The Bible speaks clearly about homosexuality and other sins:
Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
Apparently the church in Corinth was filled with a bunch of men and women just like us.
Exodus International is a ministry for homosexuals. They report a genuine lifestyle change for up to 50% of the people they minister to, although what success means is ambiguous in this case.
There is also an interesting review of 31 different studies which was done by New Direction. I enjoyed reading some of this, but that's just because I'm still a psychology nerd at heart.
I hope it's you reading this. I hope you followed the link from that other place and made your way here and are beginning to realize that I am authentically concerned for you, and this has nothing to do with me wanting to control you or change you. It doesn't even have anything to do with the fact that while I was thinking of you from time to time over the years, I was thinking about you as a woman as well as a great person. I may be a romantic at heart, but you're a lesbian and I am also a realist. If you would be my friend and never change a thing about the person you are right now, I would consider myself the lucky one. I don't know why, but I have always felt that way about you. You're a fantastic person, and I think that's why you've got so many friends in so many places.
You are in my prayers.
(Edit - It just occurred to me how funny it is that I would post this in my blog because this is where the least amount of people will see it)
I have recently come into contact with a friend from college, well, more of an acquaintance but somebody I really liked and thought well of, who is now a lesbian. (okay, let's not argue about the exigesis of lesbianism, ie. whether it has genetic causation. I'm not saying that she was or wasn't always a lesbian, I'm just saying that right now, if you were to ask her, she would say "I am a lesbian.")
I was really psyched when I found her on-line. Over the years she's someone that I've thought about from time to time and wished I had stayed in touch with. When we were in college (Geneva College) we shared some of the same "hobbies" that other students at Geneva wouldn't normally participate in. Okay, we liked to party and we both had an affinity for the Grateful Dead. We also were both Psychology majors, and we did at least one study/paper together. I've just always thought she was so intelligent and she made me laugh. Even now, I read through her blog and I am just cracking up.
Before I go on, let's get one thing clear. I am a liar and a thief. I have no inherent right to my salvation, it is only by the grace of God that I am saved. I judge nobody, at least not unrighteously. Well, I try not to anyway. I just want to throw that out there, because I am not dealing with emotions right now in writing this, only in what has been reported and what is written. Most importantly for this conversation, I am not judging her or the choice she has made. (Again, whether or not it was a choice is not the focus of this conversation, but I would certainly be willing to hear your opinion. Especially if you don't try to denigrate me as a person if my opinion is not the same as yours........you know, I'm not sure when I took on this whole peaceful diplomatic personality that's been developing recently, but I'm starting to make myself a little sick with all of it. Why can't I just tell people to stick it in their ear like I used to?)
Anyhoo....I've been praying for my friend, and I've been trying to just be a friend and nothing more. I have been praying that God would afford me the opportunity to talk with her about this as well, but we've only been back in touch for a short time and that hasn't, and may not happen. In short, I'm attempting to model my behavior after what I know of Jesus.
I also don't want to preach, and I don't think I have anything new to add to the conversations that may have already taken place in real life, or at least inside of her head concerning the Biblical stance on homosexuality.
I just want to tell her that I can't make it through my day without God leading the way. There are other things that she has written in her blog that I am empathetic to, things that have nothing to do with sex, but have to do with things like family, lonliness and having your heart broken. I just want her to know that I've been through so many of those circumstances, I've tried to shoulder the burden myself through situations just like those, but I have finally realized after last year that I can't do it. It was one of the hardest things I ever had to admit, but it freed me. I am not a weak man, not physically, not mentally and not spiritually, but I am woefully underequipped to handle all of the things that the world throws at us day after day after day after day.....
So, I don't want to preach, but I wouldn't mind informing. I did a little research today and I found out a few things.
The Bible speaks clearly about homosexuality and other sins:
Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
Apparently the church in Corinth was filled with a bunch of men and women just like us.
Exodus International is a ministry for homosexuals. They report a genuine lifestyle change for up to 50% of the people they minister to, although what success means is ambiguous in this case.
There is also an interesting review of 31 different studies which was done by New Direction. I enjoyed reading some of this, but that's just because I'm still a psychology nerd at heart.
I hope it's you reading this. I hope you followed the link from that other place and made your way here and are beginning to realize that I am authentically concerned for you, and this has nothing to do with me wanting to control you or change you. It doesn't even have anything to do with the fact that while I was thinking of you from time to time over the years, I was thinking about you as a woman as well as a great person. I may be a romantic at heart, but you're a lesbian and I am also a realist. If you would be my friend and never change a thing about the person you are right now, I would consider myself the lucky one. I don't know why, but I have always felt that way about you. You're a fantastic person, and I think that's why you've got so many friends in so many places.
You are in my prayers.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
American Pink Collar: An Abortion Story
American Pink Collar: An Abortion Story
I've gotten into a pseudo debate in the comments section of this blog post concerning abortion. I think it's good for all of us to air our views and see how they stand up against argument. So far the tone has been pretty cordial, so if you have any feelings about this subject this might be a good forum for you as well.
I've gotten into a pseudo debate in the comments section of this blog post concerning abortion. I think it's good for all of us to air our views and see how they stand up against argument. So far the tone has been pretty cordial, so if you have any feelings about this subject this might be a good forum for you as well.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
What I'm reading / Walkworthy Conference
This is what I'm reading right now. I was fortunate enough to go to the Walkworthy conference sponsored by Moody Conferences over the weekend and see Mr. Weber speak. It was a great encouragement to me, and so far the book does not fail to dissapoint.
I think the most important point he made at he conference was about what we need in our lives. He related the story of a friend who was a career military man. The way Mr. Weber described it, the gentleman in question was one of the preeminent soldiers in our military (Green Beret, Special Forces, Delta Force, etc) and most likely if you've heard about a military operation over the past 20 years or so, this guy was probably right in the middle of it.
Mr. Weber asked this gentleman at one point what he considered to be the most important thing he brought into battle with him. He was expecting to get an answer that was more weapon related, but what he got surprised him. The answer supplied had nothing to do with arsenal, rather, the answer was "I need a friend who is strong enough to carry me if I take a bullet."
Mr. Weber then went on to make an illustration about how this life we live is a battle, and there is not one of us capable of getting through it without the support of others. Each of us needs to have a friend strong enough to carry us when we take that metaphorical bullet. Unfortunately, that involves making ourselves vulnerable to another man, and that is scoffed at in our society. (Think of the Bud "I love you man" commercials which mocked that very type of behavior.)
Do you have that person in your life?
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